I've been sick, but I'm going to suck it up and go to acting class tonight. I'm in that weird zone where if I go I'll be like, ugh, I shouldn't have, and if I don't go, I'll feel better this evening and wish I had went. I can do a make-up class but then I have to fit that into my schedule and sometimes it's a pain. I also want to try to a film festival later this week and it's the same day as I would have to make-up class.
Hmm, now I have a headache again and maybe should skip class. I'm completely useless when I'm sick. But I might feel better if I go to class. And I actually WANT to go to class. I have to make up my mind SOON or I miss the cut-off time and won't be able to make up the class.
I never did write about my evaluation from class several weeks ago. I was really curious how it would go because I felt like I had this massive breakthrough and improved more in the past month than I did last year. I was just hoping my teacher wouldn't ask me the reason behind this sudden change because to be honest, I really don't know why, but tried to come up with a few possible explanations. I was hoping they would be like, don't think about why it's happening, just keep it up!
Nothing really surprising came up in the evaluation. I always feel like it's report card time when this rolls around. Anyway, my teacher did bring up my recent "shift" and asked me why it happened. Ugh. I said I was trying not to let things affect me as much in general and I'm really trying to focus on some specific things that really ground me when we do scenes in class. My teacher's reaction to that was pretty much, "duh, I've been saying that all along!" Okay, so it took me a little longer! But to be completely honest, I don't think that's the whole story. I don't know why I had this breakthrough, but I think it's something more than what we talked about. It's like someone flipped a switch and it all makes sense now.
Then we got to the portion of the evaluation where we talk about what I need to work on and the dreaded "C" word came up. Confindence. Ugh. Basically my teacher told me to keep doing what I'm doing and to have confidence about it because they're not really sure where I am with that. Ugh. I hate having a talk about confidence. I don't know if I come off as confident or not. I try to but don’t know if I do. Then my teacher told me that I've been in class long enough that I should be at the top of the class confidence-wise.
But I guess none of that matters because now I'm switching class. But in a weird way I think that bumped up my confidence because I'm like "hey, they think I'm good enough to be in that class!"
In other news, the person who teaches the new class I'm going to be taking was the guest speaker at my class on Saturday. I'm not completely surprised by this and had an odd feeling they would be one of the guest speakers. But it's still kind of weird - teacher A is a guest in Class B, and teacher B is going to be a guest in Class A. So I don’t know if this makes things easier or more complicated with trying to get my teacher to let me come to the class where teacher B is the guest. Ugh. Will they be like, "oh, you don't need to meet them, you know them" or "it will be good to show them a prepared scene." Hmm. I actually did talk to someone who used to be in Class A with me and is now in Class B - they said that I should try to go to the class where teacher B is the guest, I should tell them that I take teacher B's class now, and I've been in class A long enough that they should just let me go for free. Lol. I like that answer, but this person is a little odd, so I don't know. They did agree that it was weird and a waste of time to end the class on the prep week.
Either way, this was sort of the missing piece to the puzzle - I wanted teacher B to know I'm in class A and study with teacher A. Now they know. Still, I'd really like to show teacher B what I can do with a prepared scene. I need to talk to my current teacher and my argument is going to be that teacher B knows me and I want them to see what I can do with a scene I've worked on all week. Of course, now I need to do a kick-ass job or it's all a waste of time and will hurt me more than help me. Oy! The pressure!
Okay, I guess I'm going to class tonight. I need to go get ready.
No comments:
Post a Comment